Hi. I’m Andrea Abay-Abay, a 3/5 Emotionally Defined Projector who is experimenting with Human Design.
Understanding my Human Design has been a personal journey of discovery unlike anything else in it’s ability to help me uncover the fulfilling life I was truly meant for.
My journey began with a reading by a professionally trained Human Design analyst for an overview of my Rave Bodygraph to meet my Aura Type – a Projector – and to find out my strategy as a Projector, which is to wait for the invitation. I also discovered my inner Authority, which is my Solar Plexus center, the source of powerful emotions that I regularly experience, through which I need to wait patiently for clarity in order to decide what invitations are right for me.
My next step was a Living Your Design Awakening Program, which I began with Human Design America in May of 2013. This LYD awakening program was the perfect way for me to begin the process known as “Deconditioning,” which is a seven year cellular renewal while transferring decision making from mind to Inner Authority.
Following the Strategy of my Type and honoring where I was designed to make decisions as my truth has begun to make me aware of “Not-Self” behaviors that lead to resistance.
The LYD program taught me how to reduce resistance in my life and allow the emergence of my true gifts, talents and uniqueness.
Deconditioning had the ability to eventually break through my mind’s death grip on my life. It literally was a death grip. I came close to ending my life just to end the pain.
Our minds have absolutely no business running our lives, and often, for the vast majority of people, our minds are killing us slowly.
Not only would I try to make decisions with my mind, I gave other people authority over decision-making in my life. It was a surefire way to end up living a not-self life.
In other words, making decisions from my mind was the way I ended up living a life filled with resistance that showed up as bitterness for me, as a Projector. Improper flow of energy in my life lead to incorrect living in the form of extreme anxiety, confusion, burnout, depression, dis-ease and exhaustion, which I tried to hide from everyone except the people who were very close to me.
In the LYD awakening program I was guided through the 9 Centers of the Human Design Bodygraph, and how they are designed to operate correctly as well as what they operate like when incorrect. I was encouraged take a good hard look at the ways in which I was protecting, what I thought of as myself, which was really my not-self. Most people operate from not-self, which is their mind’s fearful way of mal-functioning in order to avoid pain, and I was deeply, deeply conditioned to be the same.
Making decisions from my openness, which amplified the energies around me, distorted my perception of what was true for me, and lead me to living a life that I was totally not suited for.
It takes a very high level of awareness and a very deep level of honesty to begin to see the ways in which my mind had taken over running – and ruining – my life. Through writing and social media, I’m documenting my experiment of following my Strategy and Authority if you’d like to join me in this journey.
I want my primary focus to be on the basics of Human Design, on the two things that I know will help shatter the hold of my mind’s not-self behavior in my life. And that is, recognizing the signposts of the mind’s control over my decision making process, and learning how to follow my Human Design Strategy, while honoring my inner Authority instead of my mind.
This core perspective shift on how to handle decision making in life can bypass the traps of mind and the pitfalls of living as not-self. I am beginning to recognize the not-self ways in which I protect myself, and discovering the life that I were born to live, revealing the uniqueness of my true self that I was designed to be.
As an Emotional, Split Definition and unaware Projector, it took a longer, deeper amount of study and observation of others in order to understand my reality enough to even begin this perspective shift. I have lived through the struggle, suffering and deep pain of living as Not-Self for nearly all of my 37 years. I’m still in the very beginning of my first 7 year cycle of deconditioning. I’m still learning and often, laughing about all the ways my mind is incredibly incompetent when it comes to making decisions in my life.
As a Projector, I can see so many things with this brilliant mind about OTHER people and their lives. And that’s truly what our minds are here for. Mind is an outer authority. Its here for the other. The only difference between you and I is that I have a little more time experimenting with this knowledge and I have lived through enough of my own experiment, watched enough of other people’s experiments, to know that this stuff works – that Human Design works. It brings relaxation into your being as you settle into who you really are instead of agonizing over who you are not.
If you are reading this, I know Human Design can work for you too, if you stick with the experiment and wake up to the illusion you live in. This knowledge may not be possible for everyone to grasp. However, I know I can make a contribution to furthering Human Design’s presence in the world for those who may be inspired, when I allow myself to be the creative role model of someone who knows where they are going.
But don’t take my word for it. Learn how to live your design – and that’s what the LYD awakening program is all about. It will give you the foundation of looking at the Centers so that you can begin to recognize your “Not-Self” and uncover what lies within you that you can always rely on.
I know I can direct you to resources and tools for further study, tools like MyBodygraph.com. Hopefully I can help to inspire you to begin your experiment, but it will be you, and you alone who will find correctness or not.
You know, a friend on Facebook told me recently “We are alone. But we don’t have to be lonely.”
Forging ahead with this Human Design experiment, I don’t want to be lonely anymore. That’s why I’m sharing with you now. So if any of this resonates with you, I invite you to join me.
It is up to you to decide to get a reading from an analyst and participate in a Living Your Design awakening program to begin your own experiment. It is up to you to take in this knowledge and actually do something with it.
Knowledge alone is not power.
Experiential wisdom put into action (or non-action) when correct, is power.
I want to facilitate my process of learning viscerally what it really means to live out the truth of my design by sharing my journey with you. I’d like to ask for any help, encouragement and support that you feel inspired to give so that together, we can come to understand the mechanics to this Maia, this illusion of separateness that we all live in. I know I can master the mechanics with patience, study, and time.
After all, Projectors are here to master systems, and the Human Design System is the most powerful resource I’ve found to help facilitate awareness and awakening in this life.
Being a 3/5 Profile means I’ll be making mistakes along the way. But that is how I learn, so that I can share my learning of what doesn’t work with others who ask for my guidance, so that they don’t have to make those same mistakes. So, please excuse any mistakes I make as far as sharing in my experiment, as well as the vast knowledge Human Design covers. I appreciate your feedback, comments and questions as I move along in my experiment..
So welcome to My Human Design Experiment and I look forward to sharing this journey with you as we awaken to our true selves.